I’ve been thinking about how to share this story with you. This morning, I woke up inspired to just share the whole thing and let you sift through the various ins and outs. Those of you who email me seems to like my long, rambling stories the most so here we go. I’ve written dribs and drabs of this… here’s the whole thing. Here’s to dreams!

When I was a senior in high school, I took a Creative Writing class with Mr. Bob Reed at R.L. Paschal High School in Fort Worth, Texas. For those of you who don’t know Ft. Worth, Paschal is a few blocks from Texas Christian University and our school colors were purple and white, just like TCU. Paschal is one of the oldest high schools in Fort Worth and it is situated in a historical area full of beautiful tudor-style, modern and traditional houses. I love the area because there are so much mature landscaping, including many old oak trees.

My senior year, I was dating a crazy guy…I broke up with him, but he was stalking me. So, the last six weeks of my senior year, I packed everything up, transferred to a school in Abilene, Texas (where I was born and also where my step dad’s parents lived) to finish the year.

Now, way back then, I won’t lie to you. I was all about working (as in J.O.B.), not school work. I was relentlessly bored in school and showed up just enough to play tennis, do my extracurricular activities and take the tests so I could stay in Honor Society. 

Mr. Reed gave me an ultimatum. I had already missed entering my short story in the Tarrant County Junior College writing contest. Apparently Mr. Reed thought my short story, Mary Jane, which was about a little country tom girl who was in ‘like’ with her little friend, would be a contender. One of my classmates won first place in that contest I had not even entered. He told me he would drop my grade a letter if I didn’t enter my story in the next one – the TCU writing contest.

At 4:56 pm, the day it was due by 5:00 pm, I ran up the front sidewalk as fast as I could hoping I could still get the entry in. I didn’t care about the contest, I just wanted to work, I wanted to be free and do my own thing and I just wanted to get on to college. I was already going to junior college part-time. Oh, and I needed to get packed to try to get away from Mr. Stalker! I had enough to do without worrying about some contest.

I ended up running into a very helpful person who pointed me to the right office and I slid the envelope under the door just in time (literally).

I was in school in Abilene when I received a package letting me know that I had won first place. My story was printed in the newsletter with the other winners. I don’t even think I cared at the time because my attention was so far out into the future. I certainly wasn’t present. Isn’t life ironic?

When I graduated from high school, I came back to graduation ceremonies and could breathe a sign of relief because my crazy boyfriend enlisted in the Army and was shipped off. Good-bye Mr. Stalker!

I am not sure I even took the time to acknowledge my writing, my love of writing or even consider I might be able to do something in writing. For me, freedom meant money and the sooner I had more money, the faster I could get to the freedom I so desperately desired.

I initially enrolled in school for business (that’s where the money is, right?), and dabbled in the idea of journalism, but quickly rejected it once I found out how much journalists make. Ditto for teaching, which I thought would be so fun to teach kids. Ah, to go back and know what I know now!

I made my mark in business, got two degrees along the way, created a very successful consulting practice, but something still was off. True, I have been writing most of my business career – and helping many people make a lot of money with my writing – from proposals that sell, to newsletters that connect businesses to businesses, to sales letters with huge returns, to reports that convey a unique message that speaks to the heart – I’ve been writing.

Then, one day, this Queen of Dreams character came along. She was fun, she was spunky, she was me before I started focusing on the world and making my way in it! About two years after this cartoon came to mind, I received a TCU Continuing Education catalog in the mail. I found it interesting as I had never received one before nor have I received on since. I looked and there were some writing classes, and I felt pulled to attend two of them.

I signed up, sent in the check and waited for the day to arrive. When I drove to TCU (by the way, the area around TCU, which is known as TCU hill, is one of my favorite places in the world! I love Fort Worth), I felt different. I felt this amazing energy of magic in the air. When I drove through the campus, I looked over at the sidewalk where I had sprinted decades before hoping to save my grade.

The class was fun, but I knew I wasn’t there for the class. I had taken myself there to remember what I knew way back then. That I am a writer. That I love to write. That I am a talented writer. As I walked along the campus, I felt happy and alive. I felt a magical electricity in the air. It seemed to whisper, You can do this.

Many other books and movies echoed that idea to my heart repeatedly. It is only in hindsight that I can see them so clearly. Movies such as Miss Potter held me entranced in the idea of writing as an occupation. I understood what it meant to have a character talk to you. That’s what writers do. I seemed to be stumbling over writer after writer who dared to dream and, more importantly, write. Po Bronson showed up. He had lived in the maze and dared to write meaningful books on his own terms, in his own way.

At times, I felt pulled to attend a writers’ workshop the teacher mentioned during that TCU writing class. I didn’t go. I made excuses. There’s a deafening silence that your heart makes when it quits whispering. I noticed the silence. The quiet reserve of, “I’ll wait for you.”

In the meantime, I published two books – books I wrote as much for myself as for others; wrote two others and authored more articles, blog entries and other business writings than I can even keep track of. I also learned how to love myself, how to acknowledge myself without wincing inside, how to be vulnerable without withering within and how to compassionately love others as myself. It’s been a busy time of growth and introspection. I’ve been growing into myself.

I realize now, two years ago, despite all of the outward encouragement (from Jan, my book publishing consultant “You have something really special,” from many publishers who requested my manuscript, from reviewers who loved my book, the reminder of the TCU award and the others I won in school, and so many more it would be quite embarrassing to list them!) that I simply didn’t feel I had the goods. What was I waiting for?

I have known for a long time we can’t ‘give’ to someone what must come from within. For me, I had to decide to make the trek from my head to my heart. I had to leap and have faith the net would appear.

And, so I have.

I can share with you that your big dream will feel really, really, possibly humongously big! It doesn’t feel like an accomplishment goal does, which, for me, feels like getting in a car and driving to a destination. In that place, I feel I can never rest. It’s always go, go, go. The next thing, the next thing, it’s never ending. It’s exhausting to me.

For me, the waking dream feels big, wide, lush like a valley. It feels like a place you go to live in, not a place you visit before rushing off to another destination (goal). It feels like coming home. It feels magical. It feels like everything you will create is already done. It has the feeling I’ve been searching for my entire life – a place where I can rest and know I’m just where I’m supposed to be.

I recently read an article about a woman who wrote about her experience with this. She is a writer, and as soon as she published her first novel, she knew it wasn’t ‘home.’ It took her NINE books before she found her valley. Now, she is happily creating from that place. I read that, and thought, ‘That’s just how life is… we create as we go and as we create, we get clearer and clearer, fine-tuning along the way.’

The most important thing is to let your heart roam so it can guide you home.

So, what’s your juicy dream? The one that you haven’t let see the light of day?

What? The Queen of Dreams is saying something new here? Follow your dream. That’s not new!

But it really is. For me!

When I spoke at the Snap Out of It Conference a few months ago, I enjoyed it so much because I really showed up as ‘me’ in my spirit… that girl who I used to be at six who was carefree, who talked to and walked in nature, who loved to make people laugh and who loved to be creative. That girl is the girl who also dreamt of writing books for children.

That day, I said to the audience, “I want to know what your real dream is. You know, the one that is in the back of your heart that you don’t tell anyone! I want to hear about that one!”

As I said it to the women in the audience that day, I must have been listening, too. Ever since then, my heart has been whispering to write. To go to writer’s groups that I wanted to attend TWO YEARS ago! That I didn’t dare – until I was ready!

Way back when (I mean, waaaaaay back when – lol) I was a little girl, my cherished idol was Judy Blume. I would read and reread her books even though I was really too young for them. I have always seemed to be ahead of my age, and read, Are You There God, It’s Me Margaret when I was six! I remember going to the library asking the librarian how I could find out who Judy Blume was – Who is she? I wanted to know. Who wrote this book? I wanted to know. How can I do this too? I wanted to know.

Now, as a 40-something woman I look back at that and wonder why I wanted to know. That is so not a six-year-old thing to do, you know. I also remember saying, “I’m a writer. I’m a writer just like Judy Blume!” around the same age as I sat on the sidewalk out in front of our military housing, typhoon-resistant house when we lived in Guam. Only the breeze heard my proclamation.

Now, nearly 36 years after that moment, I’ve decided to revisit my childhood dream of writing for children. Nearly 36 years later, I would find out that I am a lot like Judy in that she had a very personal relationship with God, too. And, the book that spoke to my heart was the first book she wrote from the heart. Wow! As Samuel Taylor Coleridge says, “What comes from the heart goes to the heart.” I guess so!

Did the Earth stand still when I decided to let the dream out of my heart? Hardly. But something did happen to me. Something that is so hard to explain, and yet something really, really big for me. Does this mean I’ll quit writing for adults? Hardly. I already am working on two more books in the Queen of Dreams Quintessential Guides series.

For now, though, I want to see what will happen when I give this dream some attention.

What dream are you holding? What dream wants to leap out of you and into the world?

More tomorrow on my little journey… dreams part deux!

Hey everyone. Of course, if you’ve read my blog, you *know* I am a HUGE fan of the movie and the icon known as, Temple Grandin!

I watched the Emmys so wanting EVERYONE in that movie to win for the masterpiece it was – and they did!

Congrats to Julia Ormond (loved you since Legends of the Fall) who played Eustasia Grandin (Temple’s mom), David Strathairn (Temple’s teacher who ‘saw’ her brilliance) and amazing Claire Danes (Temple) who captured Temple’s larger than life spirit.

And, to director, Mick Jackson… wow, what a masterpiece you directed! Thanks so much HBO for putting out quality films like this and to the producer I can’t remember your name… for bringing it to life!

Seriously. If you have not seen this movie, go rent it today!

I’ve always felt that we act as angels for each other. The question is are we accepting our job at various times! A friend sent this to me and I felt it so beautifully described this… enjoy!

Breakfast at McDonald’s

This is a good story and is true, please read it all the way through until the end! (After the story, there are some very interesting facts!):
I am a mother of three (ages 14, 12, 3) and have recently completed my college degree.

The last class I had to take was Sociology.

The teacher was absolutely inspiring with the qualities that I wish every human being had been graced with. Her last project of the term was called, ‘Smile.’

The class was asked to go out and smile at three people and document their reactions. I am a very friendly person and always smile at everyone and say hello anyway. So, I thought this would be a piece of cake,
literally.

Soon after we were assigned the project, my husband, youngest son, and I went out to McDonald’s one crisp March morning. It was just our way of sharing special playtime with our son.

We were standing in line, waiting to be served, when all of a sudden everyone around us began to back away, and then even my husband did.
I did not move an inch… an overwhelming feeling of panic welled up inside of me as I turned to see why they had moved. As I turned around I smelled a horrible ‘dirty body’ smell, and there standing behind me were two poor homeless men.

As I looked down at the short gentleman, close to me, he was ‘smiling’ His beautiful sky blue eyes were full of God’s Light as he searched for acceptance……

He said, ‘Good day’ as he counted the few coins he had been clutching..
The second man fumbled with his hands as he stood behind his friend. I realized the second man was mentally challenged and the blue-eyed gentleman was his salvation. I held my tears as I stood there with them.

The young lady at the counter asked him what they wanted. He said, ‘Coffee is all Miss’ because that was all they could afford. (If they wanted to sit in the restaurant and warm up, they had to buy something. He just wanted to be warm).

Then I really felt it – the compulsion was so great I almost reached out and embraced the little man with the blue eyes. That is when I noticed all eyes in the restaurant were set on me, judging my every action. I smiled and asked the young lady behind the counter to give me two more breakfast meals on a separate tray. I then walked around the corner to the table that the men had chosen as a resting spot. I put the tray on the table and laid my hand on the blue-eyed gentleman’s cold hand. He looked up at me, with tears in his eyes, and said, ‘Thank you.’ I leaned over, began to pat his hand and said, ‘I did not do this for you. God is here working through me to give you hope.’ I started to cry as I walked away to join my husband and son.

When I sat down my husband smiled at me and said, ‘That is why God gave you to me, Honey, to give me hope.’ We held hands for a moment and at that time, we knew that only because of the Grace that we had been given were we able to give. We are not church goers, but we are believers. That day showed me the pure Light of God’s sweet love.

I returned to college, on the last evening of class, with this story in hand. I turned in ‘my project’ and the instructor read it. Then she looked up at me and said, ‘May I share this?’ I slowly nodded as she got the attention of the class. She began to read and that is when I knew that we as human beings and being part of God share this need to heal people and to be healed.

In my own way I had touched the people at McDonald’s, my son,the instructor, and every soul that shared the classroom on the last night I spent as a college student.

I graduated with one of the biggest lessons I would ever learn:
UNCONDITIONAL ACCEPTANCE.

Much love and compassion is sent to each and every person who may read this and learn how to LOVE PEOPLE AND USE THINGS - 
NOT LOVE THINGS AND USE PEOPLE.

Looking for a Dream Life:

• God works in and through you - Even at McDonalds

I dropped by Starbucks yesterday to get a Cafe Vanilla Frappucino – my newest sugary addiction (thanks, Kathy Light!). I pulled up to pay and the most amazing smile met me at the window. This woman’s radiance and spirit were dazzling. She had no make-up on that I could see, but she was absolutely beautiful!

As we chatted, some part of my brain was saying… something is off here. I was like, “Shhh, would you? I’m having fun here!” But it persisted, and that’s when I noticed the mustache. Not a small one. Not a few facial hairs, but a full blown mustache like the one below.

I noticed it, I took it in, then I told that part of my mind, “Shhh, would you? I’m having fun talking to this sparkly girl!”

In every moment, we can live in our spirit or our judger…both being important. Spirit is waaaay more fun, for sure!

Susie Jordan, my soul sister friend from the one heart tribe sent me this. Wow, what a gift! I hope you enjoy. I love you, too.

Sivan…what a gift you have given us. Big hug.

P.S. I hope back to school brought fun, joy and loads of memories for all of you students, parents and kiddos. The kids in this video…wow, so sweet!

A couple of days ago, I found myself again irritated (will mid September EVER get here with its reprieve of this divine kick in the tush???) about the silly way that the books from neighboring libraries can’t be rechecked. It seems like such a small thing, but a trek 10 miles north to recheck a book I wanted to read that evening resulted in me ‘remembering’ that the neighboring city’s library will not re-check a book like our city library will. Arrrrgh!

Okay, fine, I say. I’ll read something else (but, I really wanted to read THAT one!), but it’s okay, really.

We drive down to our city’s library, and the two books I thought I was going to re-check from our library (because they will recheck a book) ends up becoming one because ONE of the those two is from the library I just left! Oh, man, I could have…no, I could not have rechecked it because they don’t allow that. Oh, yeah, right.

Are you feeling my irritation?

As Mark stood next to me watching my irritation pour over my body, he leaned in and said, “Everything’s perfect, right?”

And that little sentence snapped me back into my body, into the present, and I thought… “Okay, where’s the gift?” I walked over to the computer to request the two books, and sure enough… there it was. Both books I wanted were available in our library system, which means I can check and recheck them out without any more trips to the library until I am done with this project.

Everything is perfect.

And that reminded me of this video… enjoy!

Isn’t that little boy great? Hang in there… just a little less than a month and we are home free with this energy surge. Use this time wisely to address whatever is coming up for you, and remember…claim your gift!

One of my favorite things to see in my inbox is an email from Lynn Scheurell. Lynn is a great lover of life and people, and an extraordinary finder of really cool, crazy, thought-provoking pop culture tidbits. Thanks, Lynn!

Her latest find? All the way from Finland, photographs one mother took of her sleeping baby posed in all kinds of things this new mom thought her baby, Mila, might be dreaming of.

Soooooo sweet! Go, right now, get a cup of tea and spend five minutes in Mila’s big dream world!

To see the photos of Mila’s daydreams (there are more photos here than are in the video and they are all TOOOO precious and utterly creative and clever): http://www.milasdaydreams.blogspot.com/

To see a 2-minute video (featuring her Dad’s music):

Two movie reviews in a row here. I HAVE to tell you all about the movie, Temple Grandin. Nominated for FIFTEEN Emmies (we’ll see next Sunday), this movie is an exquisite work of art. For families who are sensitive (this just means that you may feel overwhelmed out in the ‘noisy’ world) or have a person in their family who is sensitive (which may include autism or Aspergers Syndrome), this is THE movie for you to see. In addition to seeing the hopeful story of Temple Grandin, it truly is a gift to be able to understand what it means to be sensitive in the world.

Dr. Temple Grandin is the heroic crusader for the humane treatment of cattle. She has been named by Time Magazine Tim 100 as a Hero.  I heard about her some years ago and just fell in love with her spirit. Though I knew she was autistic, had created her own way of dealing with her feelings (through a machine she dubbed “the hug machine”), and had done the near impossible to bring humane treatment of cattle to an industry as old as the hills, I had not really understood why I immediately felt such a connection to her when I heard about her.

Now I do.

This movie is a work of art. Not only is the cast perfect in every way, but the director’s visionary storytelling shines through as we get to peer into Temple’s mind, heart and soul. I particularly loved getting to see her mother’s influence as well as key people she met along the way.

I won’t spoil this movie with why it is such a wonderful visual treat, but I will share with you what we walked away with as a family.

First, as many of you know, our entire family is sensitive. Mark and I are empaths and Chance is extremely sensitive too. Even Rico, our four-legged gentle giant is sensitive!

Mark, as a child, would retreat from the world into his room or with just a few key friends. He ran a lot to run off the energy. I used to retreat to nature to soothe my frazzled nerves. I walked miles and miles every day when I was a kid. Food numbed me out. For Mark, he MUST work out every day. Neither one of us had language for what we are until about 10 years ago when we met each other and began to live a life of celebrating who we are rather than tolerating feeling like the world was beating us up each day.

When Chance came along, I noticed that he didn’t act like the other babies. He was aware of things that the other kids didn’t seem to notice. One day, for instance, I took him to the mall to play. In this play area, it looked like a huge breakfast – plate with eggs, a giant grapefruit, and salt and pepper shakers. The kids around Chance were running around with little awareness of anything around them. They would run into each other. They seemed to be wild. Chance, on the other hand, was little… just over a year and he would look around at all of them and then would carefully make his way over to a place in the play area. He then rolled onto his back and stared up at the giant skylight that looked like a prism of glass.  He and Mark ‘watched a movie’ together when he was just 19 months old. That isn’t particularly unusual except that Chance watched it and it was Castaway – a movie that is nearly three hours long. As a toddler, he would stare off. He would go into spacey trances – just like I do.

I kept noticing these things. I talked to Mark about them, and each time Mark told me not to worry. The doctors seemed to say the same things: He’s fine. He’s just quiet. He is just more observant than other children. But then Chance got older and he couldn’t handle very much input when we went out – especially noises – we didn’t go to a regular movie at the theater until he was nearly five years old because they are just too loud – even with earplugs. Itchy clothes, tags on the back of shirts were just as intolerable, and now his wardrobe consists mostly of very old t-shirts (that are as soft as silk) and polyester pull-on athletic shorts that have soft seams on the inside. Good thing we are all laid back, not worried about what other people think and he’s homeschooled now. When he was little, he attended a Christian Academy and they did not understand why tucking in a shirt would rub against his skin. Nor did they ever know that we bought his clothes oversized so the required khaki pants wouldn’t even touch his skin and that we washed and washed his uniform shirts so they would be softer.

Because I have learned to love and accept myself as I am, and also deal with my own sensitivities, I’ve been able to help Chance understand that when we get too much energy, we just need a break from it. I’ve helped him understand that we create our own energy from within, too, such as anger, hurt and love. It is our job to manage ourselves and to be responsible for ourselves – just like everyone else.

While we’ve talked like this for years within our family, it wasn’t until we watched the movie together that we had a visual point of reference to discuss. Chance immediately recognized his own behaviors in Temple – there is one scene where she is very overwhelmed and doesn’t know what to do with herself. This is exactly how most sensitives feel, too. At least that’s what I’ve learned from working with clients. Sure, Temple’s are exaggerated, but any sensitive can recognize the all too familiar behaviors. 

As we talked afterward as a family, I continued to say that God creates all of us just the way we are supposed to be, and it is our job to unlock the treasure box we are given. That’s what Temple did. As we talked about there’s nothing wrong with someone who is different, Chance began to see that being sensitive is a gift. For what, we don’t yet know. For Temple, her connection to the animals was a gift to her and to them. Her gift took her to a perfect place to share who she is. For us, our sensitivity allows us to see and know things without much effort, and to have a tremendous level of compassion for others.

Mark has said he isn’t interested in label for ‘why’ we are all like this – I almost died at 7 months, Mark nearly died at birth and two other times since – but rather how we can work with what we’ve been given. I agree.

The second gift I took away from this movie is an increased compassion for myself as a child, as a young woman and as a sensitive person who had no idea what was happening to me when I would feel I was suffocating. This is how Chance describes feeling when noises are too loud around him. He has little toleration for it. For me, when I was younger, if the energy of a job got to be ‘too’ much, some part of me would take over and I would just leave. I have harbored so much guilt over that type of behavior in the past as I knew it was wrong, but I didn’t know what to do. Ditto for when the spirits would encircle me as a child – I literally felt like I was suffocating. And, again, I come back to gratitude for nature and the animals who, like Temple, brought a peace that would allow me to let go of the anxiety and overload of energy.

I remember not being able to be touched without wincing. I also remember deciding that I was going to allow people in. It took me TWO YEARS to get to a point where I could allow another person to hug me without it making my skin crawl or feeling like I needed to go screaming out the door. It wasn’t them, it was me – I just didn’t feel good when people touched me. My case wasn’t as severe as Temple’s. I would just say I didn’t like to be hugged. But that wasn’t true. I wanted to be hugged. I felt sick that I acted so isolated and cold. It wasn’t until I questioned this that I began to reach for what I wanted. Now, I hug EVERYONE, and I also can understand people who don’t want a hug, too. Now, I know how to deal with my energy and the energy of people around me.

An intensity of love came from the three of us as we each shared how our minds work. Mark’s mind is very much like Temple’s in that it is stunningly fast, connected and highly visual. This allows him to come up with solutions so fast it would make your head spin. For me, my mind works the same way, just not quite as fast. I’m very visual, but very auditory as well. I can sense/see all the doors at once and “know” which one is best for myself or for the person I’m working with. The ability to see as the observer is something Mark and I both do with ease. Chance shared that he can see things in his mind and know how they will work. He said it is the sounds and the energy of people that feel like a cloak coming to cover him up.

Yes, this was a GREAT movie, and it created a space for all of us to celebrate who we are.

I am not sure what it was about the movie that stirred something in me, but I realized that my entire life is committed to helping people see what is possible. Instead of, “Oh, look at the problem,” I point and say, “But what is the gift?” Instead of, “This is what I think I need,” I point and say, “But what is it you really want?” I help people look in a different place for the treasures…instead of no one is here to help me, I ask, “But someone is coming, so be on the look out for them.”

That’s what Temple’s mother did. She said, “Yes, you are different. But you are not less. If you can’t do this. Then what can you do?”

Claire Danes will no doubt get an Emmy AND a Golden Globe for this movie. She is AMAZING in this lead role. I love Julia Ormond (Temple’s mother) and Catherine O’Hara (Temple’s aunt) as Temple’s cheerleaders and David Strathairn (Professor Carlock – Temple’s professor at school) as the person who starts to help Temple unlock the treasure box. HBO… I love your commitment to quality movies – thank you!

Here’s a BBC documentary piece about Temple’s connection to cows, and includes footage of Temple’s mother. Enjoy!

Looking for a Dream Life:

• the observer

We went to see Karate Kid a few days ago. Remember in the original when Mr. Miaggi would say, “Wax on, Wax off”? Well, in the new version, Mr. Han says, “Put on the jacket, drop the jacket, hang up the jacket.” Same point, same result. But it got me to thinking…it’s the same way with trust. My spirit teachers have always said, “The way to grow trust is to trust.” No, that’s not a riddle; it’s just the truth. Just like hang up the jacket, drop the jacket, put on the jacket, Mr. Han is teaching Dre muscle memory… or not to ‘think’ about what he is doing. Same goes for trust. When I get guidance, just act. Just move. Trust … act. The space between these is miniscule. No thinking required. Ah, to trust implicitly! I aspire to! Spirit teachers, mentors…trusting still ultimately comes down to each moment.

One of my cherished mentors, Sonia Choquette, teaches about trusting your vibes. Her newsletter last month had one of the BEST stories of trust. Her newsletter isn’t posted on her site, so I will share a shortened version here. Sonia and her family were traveling to France, and the plane was about to board. Suddenly, she had the feeling to go and check to see if another flight that day was available going to France. This made no sense (as intuition or guidance often doesn’t look logical), but she moved toward the ticket counter straight away. With people all over the place waiting to board and the ticket agent furiously pounding away at the keyboard, Sonia asked the agent to check for another flight. Of course, the agent looked at her like she was crazy. But, true to what she teaches, Sonia stayed with her guidance and gently persisted with her request. The woman complied, and a few minutes later, the pilot showed up and told the agent that the flight had a mechanical and the passengers needed to be rerouted/reticketed – except, that is, for Sonia’s party, which were all booked on the next flight due to Sonia following her vibes. Now, that’s a story worth repeating… and a lesson worth remembering… to trust our vibes.

Trust… it’s a biggie. The only way to grow it is to trust. Don’t think… trust.

Looking for a Dream Life:

• Karate Kid Hang up the jacket

On the show this week, I had the pleasure of interviewing Mary Beth Maziarz, award-winning musician, singer, song writer and author of Kick-Ass Creativity: An Energy Makeover for Artists, Explorers, and Creative Professionals.

I made a commitment this year to cover and talk more about creativity on my show because I believe it is such a vital part of our creative power. Mary Beth offered great advice on the show (check out the podcast if you missed it). I am so grateful to Violette for introducing me to this kindred spirit because I LOVE her music. Her lyrics touched my heart and her vibe reminds me of artist favorites like Christine Kane and Sara Hickman.

Thanks, MB and here’s to kick-ass creativity! I fell in love with this song… it reminded me of how I feel about my own relationship with Mark. Check out more of Mary Beth’s videos on her YouTube Channel. You can find her music at leading retailers… she has many CDs to choose from…can’t wait to sample more myself!

Yesterday, I woke up and the left part of my body, from the shoulder to the middle of my rib cage ached like an angry vengeance. My breast, in particular, ached and throbbed with a searing burn I have only experienced a couple of other times.

“I am tired of all of this work,” my body seemed to say. “Let’s play.”

But, I had other plans for that day. A long list of to-dos and some things that have been waiting on me that only I can do. Oh, and don’t forget phone calls and such.

“Let’s play…let’s take a break,” my body beckoned. But I did not listen.

The day went along and the searing in my chest grew more intense with every item I checked off the list. Check, check, check and while part of me was satisfied, my body was raging against the day’s events.

Last night, I dropped into bed with an unbearable pain that I can’t even remember having to that severity.

This morning, I woke up and the pain – my body – was there to greet me.

“Okay, you win,” I said. “What shall we do today?” And as I relinquished my stranglehold on myself, images of my mother came flooding into my mind.

Just a couple of months after I turned 20, my mother found out that she had a fibroid tumor about the size of a large grapefruit. I didn’t know at the time that she had literally been bleeding to death for nearly a year. As I tromped around in my own smoggy wedding ideals, I could not even find an ounce of compassion for my mother who seemed to be more tired than normal. My intuition told me something was wrong, but I was 20 and selfish and focused only on what I wanted, so I just blew it off.

Today, as I these flooded my mind, I knew what took her there – a desire to be an artist, trapped in a State job with its dependability and leash of security, and a never-ending pile of bills and kids still in high school that demanded all kinds of things that cost money.

She ended up having an emergency hysterectomy. Before she could have surgery, she required a tremendous blood transfusion as she literally was nearly bled out. This is the stoicism and strength that I carry in me. How easy it is to ignore one’s body!

Today, my mother’s memory came to greet me and to remind me to take care of myself. To have compassion for the part of me that no one may know of or even see that still requires my time and attention. To allow the creative to flow and to dance. As soon as I surrendered to a day of quiet solitude – even a few hours – the burning in my left breast vanished and my energy soared.

I threw on a little denim jacket that I’ve worn for many years, but have not worn at all this year. It is a simple Liz Claiborne jacket with two chest pockets. The left one, that is just above that same left breast that yelled out today, has a quarter size hole in it. Not only did the pocket have a hole, but also the material underneath it in the jacket.

Coincidence? You decide.

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Ever experience crazy love? I mean, you know, the drive over the cliff, I’m going to die without you love? Well, turns out that new brain research has insights on what makes us fall in love, stay in love and choose love over lust.

According to brain researchers, there are three kinds of love – sexual, romantic and attachment. Those of us who fall in love and stay in love tend to run the three kinds of love at various times. Those of us who don’t, tend to start with romantic love and end the relationship when romantic love fades.

Mark and I have been married for 10 years and I’m still amazed at our connection. It makes me think of Tom Cruise’s over the top sharing on Oprah when he told her about Kate, as he calls her. I still want to be with Mark. He’s the one I dream of. I can’t think of wanting to talk to anyone else about everything. I remember a few years ago realizing that our relationship had something special. It had staying power. Many people over the years have told us we inspired them…that our romantic connection can be felt when they are around us. Others have said that we have helped them believe in true love. If you all only knew the true story of what we’ve been through together…you would be even more inspired. Our relationship is definitely a soul agreement and love.

I had been married before and by the time six months rolled around, I knew something was very wrong. I didn’t have an attachment to my then husband. I enjoyed our friendship, but the spark was gone. Eventually we were more like roommates than soul mates. I’m even more thankful today for Mark because of my first marriage. I know our relationship is special – once in a lifetime.

Nightline Prime ran a special tonight called, The Secrets of Your Mind. It was the first of four parts. i guess even crazy love can be seen in our minds. And, as it turns out, it shows up in the “addiction” part of our minds. I can’t think of any better addiction. Can you?

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Yes, you’ve heard me saying I’m going to get with the 21st century and embrace social media. True, I do know a lot about it. I understand how it works. Heck, I even get the benefits.

What I don’t have yet is a way to interface with it without being taken over by the energy. So, for all of you who have sent me messages, sent me tweet-ups, sent me invites, and all of that, I PROMISE, it isn’t for nothing…I just am a big behind the action – for now. If I haven’t answered you – it isn’t personal – it’s me!

When the kiddies go back to school (in general, not mine as he is homeschooled), I’m going to get back to basics social media style. This is just a shout out for all of you techies who are ahead of me! Thank you for sending a smoke signal!

I do have to say that I’m SHOCKED that I’ve been blogging and doing my radio for THREE YEARS! Where has the time gone? Social media… here I come! Look for a fan page soon… oh yes!

So, I don’t know what rock I’ve been hiding out under, but a few months ago, we toodled over to the Fairview shopping center to go to a movie, which ended up NOT to be the correct movie theater. The theater I thought was the correct location was not even open yet. It turned out to be the new Gold Class Cinema. I didn’t even bother to check it out as I thought it was just another new movie jaunt.

Apparently, my inner navigation knew I was meant to go there – eventually. Miss Debbie gave us a gift card for what I can only describe as a movie watching experience. One you will want to have for yourself at least once before you die – or many, many more times!

When I opened the card, I was shocked at the value of it – $100. I thought, ‘Wow, that will buy a lot of movies!’ Well, as it turns out, that’s not completely true because this isn’t just any movie theater.

This is the first class ticket equivalent for movie theaters.

When Mark and I went to see Inception last Friday night, we pulled up right next to a Bentley. Next to that, a rare Lexus, next to that a top-dollar Escalade. Hmmm, what’s going on here?

Let’s put it this way…this is the way to watch a movie. But it is not cheap. It isn’t SUPER expensive, either, though so hang in there with me.

We entered into the theater lobby that contained just two long staircases and two escalators. Everything was pristine, clean and stunning. The first thing I noticed as we stepped into the lobby was how cold it was in there despite a two-story building glass wall facing west at 4 in the afternoon and 108 degree Texas weather outside. Wow.

When we arrived at the ticket counter, the environment took on what Mark called an “airport bar” feel. I would say it was super chic, uptown style with modern accents. The staff was dressed in black and all were stunningly, model gorgeous. If the movie American Gigolo holds any of your memory’s brain cells, then you get the drift. Perfection.

We originally planned to go see Eat, Pray Love, but with theaters that only hold 40 people, two of the shows were already sold out. We settled on Inception, which friends told us was amazing. The tab for two tickets: $50.

Since we had a couple of hours before our show, we decided to have dinner. We ordered the sliders and a buffalo chicken sandwich. The sliders were $16 bucks for two sliders that were larger than most of the ones we’ve ever had (think Chili’s where they are two bites at most). These sliders were AMAZING and were a good five or six bites. The buffalo chicken sandwich was huge, but we didn’t like it as much. Then, we celebrated my birthday again (after all it was a birthday gift!) with Death by Chocolate… one of the BEST chocolate cakes we’ve ever had, and YES, we are chocolate cake experts. A cup of coffee, a glass of milk and we polished off that $100 gift card in less than two hours. We even added five bucks to what was left for the tip. **Note: Gold Class Cinemas has specials during the week, so go and have fun at a price that works for you!

So, let’s see… was it worth it? YES!

By the time we got to dessert, the frigid AC was beginning to make me feel like I was sitting in a sub zero freezer. Mark was in heaven as he is so hot natured. Ladies, take a sweater or don’t wear shorts and a tank top with a little wrap like I did.

We walked in and the 40 seats are actually recliners that go all the way back. Sandy, the bartender, told us that some people cover up with the blankets and actually fall asleep! I can see why because when we got to our seats, I curled up in my blanket and got oh so comfy! We sat in the front row, just 25 feet from the screen and it was amazing. WOW – yes, this is something even the most frugal person MUST experience! For us, we will definitely be going back!

Thanks, Debbie! And, thanks, too, for encouraging us to GO and have fun rather than saving it for a rainy day. That hot August day was the PERFECT day to go chill – literally!

P.S. I know you can order food for inside the theater, but I’m not sure how that would work out…we enjoyed eating dinner before the show. When I went to the bathroom midway through the movie, I noticed that a LOT of people enjoy their cocktails…one couple had a whole bottle of wine!

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Mark and I were sanding down our kitchen table (the one we eat at each day), and I found myself feeling inexplicably joyful. It prompted me to think of these things I’m grateful for, but would probably not make it to the highest values list…here they are:

1. I can get in touch with Mark (my husband) any time day or night. This is something that hasn’t changed in 10 years. Mark is dependable with a cap D. If you ever want to get in touch with me, call him – 469-831-2450. You will always be able to get an answer or a very quick call back if he’s on the phone. Love you honey!

2. If I am feeling blah or off, I can look at Chance and he’ll smile. If I say something to Chance, he will stop what he’s doing, look right at me and say, “Hi Mom” and smile. Guaranteed. Life should always be that reliable.

3. I have a built-in Comedy Club at my house. Between the three of us, we probably laugh more per day than most people laugh in a week or a month. Mark’s witty humor is dry, silly and guaranteed to earn an out-loud laugh. Chance’s eager comedy style is true straight man, but still can bring me to laughing tears.

4. Rico will always be needier than the average Joe. This dog never ceases to remind me that sometimes a cup is never quite full enough. And, that includes the amount of love given and received. If you pet him for 10 minutes, he’ll want 20. If you pet him 20 minutes, he’ll want 10 more. Need I say more?

5. Manual labor connects you to the present. There’s just something special about cleaning a toilet, scrubbing a bathtub, washing dishes, planting a garden, sanding a table and everything else in between that brings you to the current moment and returns a fresh perspective about everything in general. Thus, the catalyst for this post.

6. A fully-stocked Target (insert your favorite store). Ever go into a store early in the morning when it is just fully stocked? What in life is quite so picture perfect? Rows and rows of Tide lined up like little soldiers ready to go home and fight grease and grime are literally one of my favorite views. I pick Target because the aisles are wider and the floor is so shiny and reflective. The entire shopping experience is a feast for the eyes. Red does something to me that blue doesn’t, and brown can’t.

7. A juicy-unopened magazine or book. I remember the instant I fell in love with magazines. I was about 7 years old and I held a Seventeen Magazine in my lap on the bus ride to school. I read every word of every page and couldn’t wait until the next issue would arrive some 22 days later. I remember dreaming about the clothes, wanting to re-do my room and, of course, write for a magazine that would make others feel just like I did at that moment in time. A new book, beckoning to be explored holds the same experience and feeling. Mmmmm.

8. Diving into a movie again. For me, watching a favorite movie is like going to an old friend’s house. I love I can reconnect to movies in this way and appreciate them over and over again. There’s just something special about some of them that calls to me again and again.

9. A sugar rush. Remember when we were little kids and would lick the little decorations from the cake. After pulling the big Barbie-style ornament from my birthday cake one year, I melted into a sugar-fugue that I’m reminded of every time I eat a cupcake, slice of cake or even watch children licking their fingers and ornamental decorations.

10. A summer’s eve spin. When I was 16, I fell in love with driving, and that love affair has only intensified over the years. Last November, I thought I had died and gone to heaven as Abby and I toodled around in her boyfriend, Cy’s, Porsche convertible and I took in the sweeping ocean front views of San Diego. The moderate temperatures combined with the speed underneath of us of God only know how many horsepower and the wind and sun dancing on our skin was like Heaven on Earth. Mmmmmm, even here in Texas as hot as it is, at 10 or so, you can spin around with the sun roof open sharing a moment or two with the wind, moon and stars. Perfection.

Yesterday, I wrote about anger. But, seriously, is everyone crankier than normal? For me, I float around in a love-bliss state most of the time, but what I have noticed as we’ve been out and about at different times of day and in situations where we normally don’t frequent… is an overall feeling of agitation.

Beyond the headline making stories of Steven Slater and others, I believe this is indicative of the stress most people are dealing with and that there are many, many more people dealing with stress who have not ever really had to deal with stress before – white collar workers, in particular.

What I’ve seen in my companies (from our marketing agency to our current company) is that successful people can laser beam onto a goal better than most, and they can ignore pretty much anything else around them as they focus in on achieving the target set before them.

Well, isn’t that handy? (insert Church Lady voice here)

But, what happens when you don’t have a goal because the entire game board has been turned upside down? What happens when everything you thought you knew isn’t at all acting like what you believed?

Well, welcome to today. Welcome to Crankyville. Where Mr. and Mrs. Overachiever has turned into Mr. and Mrs. Crankypants.

What to do?

Quit trying to do everything the way you used to do it. That’s what is making you so cranky (and perhaps crazy and a bit OVER stressed). Start creating some new neuro pathways in your head and get back into the world – playing a new game.

You just might feel like you are 18 again!

And speaking of CRANKY… 108 degrees for days on end… this is how we feel down here in Texas! Swimming Pool anyone?

For those of you who listen to my show, you know I’ve been telling everyone to be AWARE of your anger as this summer’s energy is fast, and furious as it takes us more and more to our inner Truth.

The Jet Blue flight attendant, Steven Slater, outburst and Anthony Weiner’s outrage on the house floor are not coincidences as many people feel more and more pressure inside of themselves when they try to ‘quiet’ and ignore their Truth. Increasingly, people are letting it rip, so to speak, as they find it harder to overcome their feelings of irritation, outrage and pure anger.

Mark has been calling this summer “The Summer of Angry Women” as I have been experiencing more and more frustration, similar to these two men, about various things I believe passionately about – serving others from a true open heart without prejudice – regardless of how politically correct those prejudices are, for example. Not only have I been feeling all of this, but clients have been calling too with stories of anger that can’t be suppressed. “What’s wrong with me?” some ask.

I believe there’s nothing wrong with you. Your biology is telling it like it is. You are angry for a reason. It’s your job to figure out what that reason is.

I believe that we are a tipping point energetically. With global economic crisis (a.k.a. change), and a two to three year cycle of people in limbo, it doesn’t surprise me that people are feeling consumed with anger in its various forms.

This idea that we all are supposed to plaster smiles on our faces and not address the grit underneath is amplified during this summer as the energy is faster and unrelenting. Wherever you go, there you are, and whatever you have not been addressing in your own life WILL DEMAND your attention.

So, while I’m not saying “let ‘er rip”… I am saying, listen to your anger, your frustration, your irritations. What are you trying to ignore that won’t allow you to ignore it anymore? What action can you take right now?

I believe anger is a catalyst. It points to opportunity. For instance, with Steven, perhaps he has been desiring a different life but didn’t listen to himself. Well, he certainly is going to get some time to ponder this as he heads for the beach and a much-needed break, it appears. Every part of you will take you to what you most desire. That includes the emotion called anger.

I interviewed a woman recently for a project we are collaborating on to assist people who are displaced and who haven’t looked for a job since before the Internet even existed. As I asked question after question, I noticed that her frustration points took me right to an opportunity to serve better and to address issues people are not talking about. She was angry about how companies don’t think ahead… how they can be short-sided in how they serve. Some part of her was saying ENOUGH … we’ve got to serve people, help each other and get our country back to work!

So, before you run off thinking that your anger is something to merely be tolerated, consider that it is something to be celebrated. And, before you take in casualties with your anger, spend some time with your anger… following the grit lines (akin to grout lines) and notice what your anger is pointing out as a tremendous opportunity for you – RIGHT NOW.

Oh, and this is to Mark… my darling husband… apparently this is just “The Angry Summer”… an equal opportunity anger-opportunity fest for men and women alike.

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